Funny T-Shirt Powered by caffeine

I'm not saying I'm addicted to caffeine, but at this point I'm less of a person and more of a highly experimental coffee-powered life form. My bloodstream is basically a subscription service for espresso, and every morning my brain boots up with the speed of a 1998 desktop computer until the first sip hits. Without caffeine, I stare blankly into space like I'm waiting for a software update; with it, I suddenly have seventeen ideas, three unfinished projects, and the confidence to reorganize my entire life before lunch. If coffee ever goes extinct, I'll probably just stand perfectly still in a corner until someone plugs me into a cappuccino machine.